The Feline Directorate Issues a Statement on Clarity

A formal communiqué from the Cats.

To the humans of the Astraean jurisdiction:

It has come to our attention that you have catastrophically mismanaged clarity. After extensive observation (and several naps), we, the Feline Directorate, have reached the following conclusions:

1. Humans are excessively distractible.

Your attention wanders like a laser pointer with a dying battery.

2. Your systems are poorly designed.

If a box is available, you do not sit in it.
This is irrational.

3. You generate unnecessary noise.

We recommend reducing 80% of your communication.
Preferably by purring.

4. You misunderstand clarity.

Clarity is simply seeing the world as it is:
beneath you.

5. Effective immediately, naps are mandatory.

You cannot achieve clarity while awake for 16 consecutive hours.
This is scientifically obvious.

Final Directive

We will now oversee all future clarity initiatives.
You may continue your activities as long as they do not interfere with our naps.

Signed,
The Feline Directorate
Acting on behalf of all cats, everywhere.